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Thursday, June 6, 2013

What does it mean to be the sky?

You are the sky.
Everything else – it’s just the weather.

Today I am experiencing a storm
inside the skies are blustery and dark and tumultuous
even though the sun is shining outside, as it must always do in 
Phoenix in June.
Surprisingly, 
I have been living under this bright sun, and so
thankful to be there, for so many months, 
I had almost forgotten what it was like

to have my sky darken, 

the clouds pass over
for no apparent reason
other than a shift in the air pressure
or a butterfly flapping its wings in Cuba.

Much like weather, 

my mood can darken with a small twist, a thoughtless word spoken by
my girlfriend or a thought that passes through my head uninvited.

Living at the whims of my own emotions

is never
a day at the ball park

especially when the night is long and 

I only sleep for 3 hours and
when i do sleep the dreams are full of 
random wild children and plastic wagons being pushed into a 
blue clear sea, only to find that when i land with a splash in the water i am holding my favorite book
above my head, trying to save it. What would 
Freud say about that dream? What would you say?

This week I cut off a piece of my finger.

This is not a metaphor, I actually did cut it off
by mistake, in the kitchen on Sunday while
making dinner for my kids and my girl.

I feel like a part of me was left behind on that cutting board

but in fact, it was wrapped in a plastic bag, packed in ice
toted to the E.R. and then placed in the 
medical waste receptacle, because it could not be reattached.

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